Trigger Warnings?42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfWJuJNXvF
mentions of homophobia , and swear words... and cheating?
The automated female voice spluttered to life in the background as the loud bellows of train horns enveloped the atmosphere. The constant chatter of people helped numb his thoughts; He knows what he saw. It was unmistakable,
‘I’m sorry, I tried to warn you but-‘.the voice of his best friend echoed in his mind , the constant ringing of his phone broke him from his brooding . He begrudgingly looks at the bright and familiar face of a young man stares back at him. How many times has this been now …4?6?? He called since the ‘incident’ . He sighs before answering.
”WHAT?” He snaps,” what am I supposed to say to THAT? I need this . I need to get over her… somehow”
The line is quiet as a flicker of guilt blooms in his chest . He shouldn’t have snapped at V, he was just trying to help, wasn’t he ?
he should be apologising , he should be crying his eyes out in V’s dingy apartment, with some cheap booze and maybe a sad attempt at a Biriyani, but he doesn’t, instead he says .
” I’m going to grandma’s for a while “ he paused as if to continue, he doesn’t. The silence from the other end seems longer then it is .
” Just… just don’t do anything stupid DJ . It’s better you found out now rather then later “ V’s voice is scratchy and horse, he only gets a hum in return which seems to satisfy him …. For now. The call ends without V’s usual goodbye. So it did hurt him DJ muses .
V’s different from DJ, V’s loud , cheerful and honestly a bit annoying. He remembers the day V walked into class with his hair the brightest shade of neon pink . The professors weren’t really appreciative of this new look , he was sent to stand outside for the rest of the day . They lost a few “friends” that day but it never seemed to bother V at all, who would only give his widest shit eating grin whenever asked about the hair .
He also remembers his father’s words to him as V dropped him home weeks later the pink dye still bright as before. Dad would sit him down to ‘talk’ later that evening. His tine sharp and dripping with venom.
” Stay away from that boy. Boys like him aren’t meant for civilized society “
It took DJ a while to understand what his father has meant.. really meant.
With anger still burning he sits down on the train chair dropping his bag on the chair facing him . Tears threatening to spill
(Men don’t cry DJ!! Be a MAN!!)
His spiraling thoughts once again interrupted. This time by a voice of a woman . He looks up at her , her cloths all mismatched and uncoordinated . Eyes tired .
“Is this your bag? “ she asks her voice strangely melodious as she pushes the bag down and seating herself in its place. The air is silent , uneventful , until the train reached a station.
Chaos erupts as people shuffle in and out . In that moment of confusion a crisp note of 500 falls to the ground . Almost everyone eyes it ,but no one actually picks it up. That is until the woman from before pockets it herself and starts asking for change. DJ complies . Be it a bit irritated at her shameless antic.
After a while she buys some snacks for 200rs. 'It isn't hers so she spends the money however she pleases ' he scoffs to himself. Much later he watches as she hands a 100 to the beggars and drops the remaining 200 in a busker's cap, she also gives away the snacks she bought before to a bunch of kids busking on one of the stations the train stopped at.
DJ fidgets uncomfortably , his voice wincing in embarrassment, "I'm sorry i judged you harshly before, I thought you had no shame for picking that money off the floor when it wasn't yours. I-- Forgive me"42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMudU09UpQ
“It’s all right, Fear and shame is for the people who wanted to take it for themselves, I didn’t pick it for me so I had nothing to be scared about”, she smiles. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkDAuSZuKx
“You seem like a really good person” he says, She laughs .It’s strangely melodious, 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzq17LTAxQ
“I’m a good person?” she raises her brow, “Goodness of someone is subjective, It depends on the perception on others and the situation” she says, Adjusting her bag so it sits beside her instead of on her lap like before, Her bare hands taking their place42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1UKRc2buP
.“You saw me do it, so you think I’m a good person, If I had done the same thing but outside you would have only remembered me as someone selfish and shameless. That’s why I don’t really care for things like this.”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtEejmfDjZ
“so, Where are you headed to?” she asks , genuine interest in her eyes . 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIi1CIth2Tk
“To my grandparents, For a change of scenery” he says.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFOnN7lVNiT
“Oh, you’re on your holidays ?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs6UV7ClI6W
“No, actually” he doesn’t know why he opens up to her, something he had only done with V...he stops himself from thinking further. “Something happened I just want to get away from it that’s all”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsQBwOIOo3
This seemed to do nothing to satisfy her curiosity, “is it your girlfriend?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqc4F0KHJBr
“Yes actually” She's an ex- now. He pauses as a man selling cooldrinks passed by , the man’s nice wrinkled slightly as he glances at DJ's companion, Expression unreadable...42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80aRWqqCAr
“Why is he looking at you like that? Do you know him?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRmNdRTTYLb
“No. Anyway if you don’t mind, what happened with your girlfriend”. She changes the subject, DJ scratches the back of his head a bit.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBUHgtJxu8U
“What do I say ?well I guess she’s my ex now. We dated for a bit , but then I found out she liked someone else, we broke up for a bit ,but we got back together pretty quick ,V didn’t like it but he said he’ll be fine if that was what I really wanted”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSgZy7SfC43
“Wait who’s Vee?"42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8GxQCaPAP
“ah! He’s my friend, he didn’t like my girlfriend much at the time , but he always respected our relationship” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEFEZf8d0x
She nods ,letting him continue “Then my girlfriend became distant slowly , she started cancelling last minute. I didn’t listen when V tried to tell me what was happening until I saw it myself.” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡplZR0cCLvQ
“What did you do next? After you saw for yourself? Did you talk to her?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrdPy5MAKaQ
“What would I say?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGiNLScxKmw
“so you just left? Just like that? What if you were wrong? You should have talked to her, At least your anger would have cooled down. You would have known if she really did cheat or not”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoPqfrbg6pR
“I saw it with my own two eyes! What more is there to know?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8dt3c66ltq
“Well not everything we see can be trusted. And besides you judged me based on what you saw too didn’t you?” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TZJuN6gX3
“hah! You’re a woman too, Of Corse you wouldn’t believe me when I say she cheated. She could have approached me too you know. If she apologized and came back I would have forgiven her, but she didn’t because she knew , She know she cheated”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbwdIPC0Ly
“She cheated or not whatever it is you should have shown your anger and hurt there itself , and not carry it like now”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZscuRteal
V said the same thing, didn't he? ," but I can’t, I can’t do it” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaoZuroUYFs
“If you don’t mind may I say something” he nods “If you really want to live happily you should learn to let go, In a world where we don a mask every second, learning to let go is the only thing keeping us sane, sure she cheated on you but she didn’t take anything from you, she just made you stronger then you were before” She said it so simply, Though she looked young her words were of great experience and wisdom... Somehow it reminded him of V. His stupid face flickers into DJ's mind again but he shuts it down immediately.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIitXA1RGce
(“When something good enters your life cherish it, after it has given you some memories, that’s it , you don’t have any control over how long it stays or when it leaves. You should let go DJ”)42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9sWsL33SxJ
“just think that her time with you is over”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxoUDXO0Qq
“Who ? who taught you all this” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEE46lHMX6r
She just smiles back. That stupid grin, stupid blue jacket, faded pink hair and---42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2jfPerRoWq
“sure your words are inspiring and all, but to survive in this society based on them isn’t going to work”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXgfpV8i8kl
“this society doesn’t care about you , it cares only of what you can give it , you shouldn’t care either”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedo5l9vVxV
“It’s easy for you to say” he doesn’t know why he’s getting so worked up now, “I spent 6 months begging for her love like a madman, you know how many times I asked her out for her to say yes?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4WdJmrvIn
“you asked her out many times? Your friend was right , asking relentlessly and begging doesn’t earn you love, only pity” And that’s it, Pity. He couldn’t say anything back. It felt like his throat closed up, That relationship was never really going to last, was it? So that’s why V was so uncomfortable when DJ told him. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpb4Gsbvy9
Silence fell over them once again. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIZ9HI3rQKr
The train screeched to a halt as another station arrived, and she gets ready to leave.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINHETIVdoP
“Are you leaving?” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEzZQGyPHH
“yes, this is where I get off, I have to go” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8R6DZXirT
“Right. It was nice talking to you, my heart feels much lighter now. Thank you, I don’t know how to say this-- ” 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQ2e7ENN72
“Ah I need to get off” she turns to leave but pauses , “ If you really want someone to stay in your life longer, you should hold them close, so close that it should feel like you have forgiven all their mistakes and melt them away,"42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYUdn9DFg3h
(Mistakes. DJ not betrayal)42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRhtM8OpA5
She smiles, there is a soft dimple showing now that he sees it. Really sees her.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM42farnqh8
His thoughts came to an abrupt stop. Yet questions seem to bubble up inside him as she stepped onto the station. He should talk to her, he needs to talk to her. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7zL4kr70I
I his hurry he accidently crashes into the man selling cool drinks earlier. As the aluminum cans and bottles of fall to the coach floor . all he can think about is that woman.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfefWcbU5A
"WATCH IT DIPSHIT!!"
“She. She’s leaving,”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIu3Hw4ULU
“who? The one you were siting with? She's a dancer a club there , I’ve seen her a lot of times before, If you like her that much , look” he taps at a restroom near by “Her name and number is written here in red sketch pen, sort it yourself”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi17gN6W0PP
DJ’s world comes crashing down , Her face keeps popping up in his mind, along with the dejected voice of Vijay in the phone earlier today, he remembers the horror in the man’s face when Dinesh finally saw for himself . This time he lets the memories of yesterday rush in.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkaQsMaiYeR
He saw her the girl he loved with someone else, V was there he witnessed it too, She gasped when she realized what had been revealed. “DJ—“she whispered but before she could say anything else he walked away. It had started to rain then, V followed him. He didn’t know where he was going or what he was going to do now, he just kept walking, until he felt a tug at his shoulder.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzN0SNw1XHs
“Do you even know where you’re going?”42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GtXQnmw8r
It was V, ever so perfect ,his longer front hair now taped to his forehead, slightly shivering in the rain, but the grip on his shoulder steady as ever,42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7dInofCvDz
"Somewhere" DJ barely whispered. He hated it . his voices sounded too soft, too vulnerable. Too Weak42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1EKubf3Eb
He watched as his best friend, shrugged off his jacket. It was a bright blue, he wonders where V gets these peculiar colored cloths from. V steps closer draping it over their heads. V was warm compared to the cold rain, his fingers pruned and rough under DJ’s chin as he forces him to look at his face, DJ’s cheeks flush, he’s expecting a joke. V always cracks a joke,42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOJj4zoAEd
No matter how inappropriate the situation. Yet the sincerity in his eyes tell something different. V’s eyes are beautiful...He’s saying something but DJ can’t hear anything. Then with strength he never knew his friend possessed, he was pulled into a hug. V’s soft scratchy voice gets through the ringing in his ears. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ7RGLI1kNO
“It’s ok, You don’t have to be strong, not here” And just like that the flood gates broke. DJ cried. He let himself cry, and he stayed. Whatever happened after that was a blur…42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjrZd6iavs
Now back in the present DJ stares at himself in the worn rusted mirror of the restroom, door locked and he thinks. The red sketch mark right there clear as day, and striking blue of the jacket hidden away in his bag.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxbAddXLv3D
Her job may be wrong , but she as a person was something else entirely. He could .. he could get off the train and find her , he could call him right now and make things right, or at least reassure his friend , But as he looked at himself in the reflection and his mind drifted to what other people thought of her, them . he questions id he ever could handle the strange looks or the distain in his father’s words as their relationship progressed. Tomorrow when he’s inevitably seen next to either of them, what would the people say what would they say about him. As these questions plagued his mind he realizes something. A strange satisfaction follows him as he softly wipes the red ink off the wall.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5qlQcXd5h
He’s a coward.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32ZVfaP8tQ
He bites down on his lower lip as he silently makes his way to his seat. The person in front has changed now. He sits in silence watching the scenery unfold . he sighs as the society he cares so much about ,has done nothing to encourage him, nothing but make him fear it. So much for "civilized society"42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjkxoWrxvS
Watching the stations change felt wrong. Conforming had made him a coward , imprisoned by expectations , yet as he gets off on the next station his zip gets caught, as he attempts to force it open a resounding rip of fabric is heard. His eyes widen, a wide tear now embedded into bright blue fabric. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzudAs9YXu
"Shit" he cruses, his hands slightly trembling as he franticly tries to smooth it down. It doesn't work. The rip looked bigger now, the bright blue looking dim and dusty under the street lights. no no no no this is wrong -- thi-42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyy7sY8XZvk
A buzz in his pocket forces his attention away. He looks at the caller id. It's an old photo of himself , grainy and dull yet the bright smile on his younger self calmed him down.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWs8PJ6sMQ
He accepts the call. hands not completely steady yet. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2u35LMZHMj
"Hello?"42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgMOLwAGBm
"My lovely grand son" her voice warm and lively as she continues, "I finally figured out how to connect this damn thing! and guess what ?! i did it by myself !! "he can almost hear the smile on her wrinkled face, he should reply soon or-
"what's wrong kid.? did something happen? how's V? did you two get into a fight or-"
"no.. "he sniffs . hurriedly wiping off the tears ." No ..I.. gran ..ca- can you help me please ?"
"what happened ?"
"I... I messed up. I-- V's jacket . .. I --I don't know what to do-"
"shh it's alright. I'll help you, Your mother said you were coming to visit me, no? we'll figure something out ok Dj?" 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0D4VmZQdUw
"ok" he nods as the call ends. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXpkLnWs5j
He carefully gathers up the blue jacket folding it up neatly over his arm. gently dusting it, as he gathers his bag once more.42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoWvd28Qpf
He's going to fix this ... somehow. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Z6y12aA61
He may be a coward. but maybe ...just maybe he could be a little braver. 42Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo622vPoKSD
For V.
ns3.145.147.34da2
and then Add to home screen.