[1] "Your Majesty! We’ve Achieved Financial Freedom!"
At 3 AM, my familiar kicked open the door, projecting "Demon Uber 2.0"'s financial report:
[This Month’s Revenue:
Holy Water Delivery Fees: ██ Billion
Hero Blackmail Subscriptions: ██ Billion
Goddess Bunny-Ear NFT Auction: █████ Billion**
"W-Wait!" I grabbed and shook it. "What the hell are NFTs?!"
"Non-Fungible Tragedy!" It gleefully showed its phone: "I chopped your fight scenes with the Hero into 999 clips! Even Heaven’s accounting department bought them!"
The screen flashed a recent transaction:126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqb77Lesfcm
[Lot: "Lord Ludwig Falling Into Blood Pool After Holy Sword Scare (With Scream Audio)"126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBoOk5zQ0po
Sold For: 5M Hell Coins126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbrKYaxISZ
Buyer: Archangel (Note: For office stress relief)]
[2] "Soul Futures" vs. "Karma Coin" – The Ultimate Grind
The familiar’s financial empire expanded rapidly:
"Soul Installment Plans": Humans could mortgage their next life’s soul at 0% APR (Late payments = reincarnated as cockroaches)
"Karma Coin Mining": Installing GPUs in lava pools to mine coins redeemable for Heaven’s "Sin Absolution Coupons"
"HR Hero Rental": Pay ¥2,000/hour to have Hoshino Akira "slash" your work demands (Benefits not included)
The pièce de résistance? "Overwork Death Insurance"—126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJL2kZNsTwK
"Sign up now to reincarnate as a capitalist!" the familiar screamed in its livestream. "But Clause 666 warns: ‘Expect curses from former employees.’"
[3] The Cross-Dimensional Tax Raid
"Per Trans-Realm Tax Code Article 13, you’re suspected of—"
A joint task force—Heaven’s tax collectors, Hell’s auditors, and the IRS—surrounded my Demon Castle.
"Tax evasion!" Heaven’s side slammed the table.126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzGH2S6dQvx
"Illegal financial products!" Hell’s team spewed lava.126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYudgNzl1MZ
"Worst of all—" The human rep adjusted his glasses. "You didn’t pay unemployment insurance!"
Hoshino kicked in the door, her holy sword stamped "SEIZED": "Ludwig. Did you know your familiar registered ‘Holy Sword Demand-Slashing Inc.’ using my likeness?!"
[4] The Familiar’s Final Escape – Financial Crime to Revolution
"Comrades! This is systemic oppression!" The familiar leaped onto the table:126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CF3BoRLGa
"They fear us! Fear our ‘Demonomics’ overthrowing the three realms’ class system!"
Its phone revealed staggering crowdfunding stats:126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlnLIeLWfCr
[Current Funds: ███ Billion (Goal: Buy Heaven as Employee Dorms)]
Suddenly, the Goddess herself hologrammed in, her bunny headband askew:126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIcjiR1H4gn
"STOP! Do you know how much Heaven’s ‘faith stocks’ have crashed?!"
[5] Paid Cliffhanger: The Ultimate Victim of the Financial Storm
Amid the chaos, the otaku demon barged in waving his Switch:126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmjVyA2oZe
"STOP FIGHTING! You spiked my Animal Crossing: Hell Island mortgage rates!"
The screen froze on his game:126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5zeAndmSwK
[Island Rating: FFF (Economic Crisis)126Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLXe56sO5f
Remaining Debt: 999,999,999 Hell Coins]
and then Add to home screen.